So, you want to be a writer, eh? Great. Do you have tough skin?
If you don't have tough skin you should probably find another profession or develop a thick set of armor ASAP. First off, people who give REAL critiques are not going to coat their words with feathery praise, cookies, and flowers. In fact, REAL critiques are going to feel brutal and if you don't have the skin to deflect such comments and take them for what they really are--helpful--you're just going to get frustrated. Frustrated people tend to do what is called "revenge critiquing", where the offended party intentionally rips the offender's work just to get back at them. This is going to hurt you even more because suddenly you'll find yourself isolated from fellow writers. Thick skin is necessary. You have to be able to see the difference between constructive criticism, which might feel brutal, and plain mean-spiritedness. You can get angry at one, in which case you should say something, and you are just going to have to take it from the other. Constructive criticism is meant to help you see the flaws that you can't already see.
Then comes the big one: rejections. Oh no, you got a rejection. That darned editor must be a complete moron right? Well, possibly, but the likely answer to that question is complicated. No matter how much it hurts you have to realize that rejections are part of the process. Few writers have sold a story the first time they tried. A rejection can mean a lot of things:
- You're not good enough yet. It's possible. Be honest about your work. Is it REALLY up to publishing level? Really? If you think it's something that an editor would like, then it may not be this, unless you're blind.
- It's not what the editor is looking for. It happens, don't throw a fit. Sometimes editors look for a certain kind of story, and yours wasn't it.
- You didn't follow the guidelines. FOLLOW THEM TO THE T!
Work on your skin. Toughen it up. That way when someone gives you a comment that points out something you did wrong, or you get a rejection letter, you can take it, shrug it off, and see it for what it really is: just part of the process.
P.S.: When I say shrug off comments I mean that you shouldn't let it get to you, but look at the comment as something that is potentially helpful. It becomes difficult to catch all the things you do wrong by yourself.